The Gobliiins Pack includes three games. These are Gobliiins, Gobliins 2: The Prince Buffoon, and Goblins 3. No, I’ve not committed some grievous spelling error – INCONTHIEVABLE! – but instead, the number of ‘i’s in the title represents the number of playable characters in each game. In an exceedingly clever twist, this sequence is perfectly inverted in series iterations.

Oh, it’s a long story. The sort of stuff rheumy granddaddies tell wide-eyed kids around the hearth on winter nights, as wolves arch and cry dismay to a clouded, bitter moon in the world outside. But it’s the same story. It always is. Intoxicated with pride and hubris, men turned wild and wicked, their reckless [...]

In and around Southern Europe, sometime between 27 BC and AD 476. The Roman Empire is all the rage, and Milan’s haute couture catwalks groan under the formidable weight of stylish bronze plating, leather pleats, and luxurious Arctic wolf’s head accessories imported all the way from that fashionably-to-die-for-darling barbarous Saxones [...]

When cadavers start turning up all over New Orleans, it can only ever be one thing: VOODOO RITUAL MURDERS. Nobody dies of natural causes in New Orleans, of course, as a matter of rigorous local policy. The chicken blood slopped all over everything, esoteric chalk markings, bits of snake, and other paraphernalia of death kinda [...]

Castles are quite possibly the coolest buildings in existence, bar none. They’re those eponymous war huts which feature in just about every medieval fantasy you’d care to mention, from the romantic ramparts of a Cinderella story to the Gothic depths of Dracula’s Castlevania abode. In post-Dark Ages Europe, they were astounding feats of deadly engineering [...]

In 1999, mankind faces an unprecedented threat of an extraterrestrial nature: violent human abduction by UFOs and hideous experimentation are increasing rapidly, creating mass hysteria amongst the world’s populace. All attempts by individual countries to resist the aliens have failed dismally [...]

Before the turn of the millennium, the PC was really the only way to go for in-depth role playing games. Sure, console gamers at the time had a lot Japanese-style, linear, hand-holding RPGs to play, but what few western-style, free-form RPGs were available on consoles weren’t all that comprehensive, to be honest. Realms of Arkania [...]

Welcome to Oddworld, home of the Magog Cartel’s premiere consumer industrial facilities, and SoulStorm Brew™. When RuptureFarms 1029 carelessly exhausts the local population of Meeches, grinding its production of the immensely popular novelty meat snack Meech Munchies™ to an abrupt and potentially commercially devastating halt, CEO Molluck the Glukkon turns a prospective eye to the [...]

Constructor is a DOS-based, tongue-in-cheek management sim that places you in control of a construction company trying to do what construction companies do best. This means, of course, that you’ll spend most of your time building cheap houses, pacifying annoyed tenants, making deals with the mob and completely screwing over any and all rivals. Before [...]

Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain is the first in the well-known Legacy of Kain Saga, initially released on the PlayStation in 1996 and ported to the PC in 1997. It has recently been abandoned on PC. If you’re active on the Playstation Network, it can be found there too. Blood Omen tells the tale of [...]

A man with a secret drives himself off the road in a storm, and wakes up in a grotty Gothic asylum. It’s also on fire, because it just wouldn’t be a proper grotty Gothic asylum if it wasn’t on fire. And just to keep things interesting in a Grand Guignol-does-soap opera sort of way, this [...]

Hard-boiled detective work, a badass trenchcoat and post-nuclear dystopia. This is what you get when you slip yourself into the … wait, you know what? We’ve been over this before. The Tex Murphy games are a set of oft-overlooked classics that put you in the shoes of the titular character: everyone’s favourite post-apocalyptic private investigator. [...]

Hard-boiled detective work, a badass trenchcoat, and post-nuclear dystopia. This is what you get when you slip yourself into the gumshoes of Tex Murphy, private investigator of the future. His love for Humphrey Bogart films is rivalled only by his eye for detail and social awkwardness, making him the ideal go-to man for all sorts [...]

The Settlers series is a grandaddy that brought aspects of gameplay which still feature in titles to this day, and part 2  (TS2) is arguably the best of the series. The primary game mode follows a group of Romans who find themselves marooned on an island, and they must establish settlements and explore before discovering [...]

The Might and Magic games have always been great. From the glorious World of Xeen back in the golden era of RPG classics, to the incredibly buggy (yet still pretty gosh-darn fun) Dark Messiah, these games have made a long-term impact in an ever-evolving market. For this delightful little review, we’ll turn our discussion to [...]

Hey, who remembers Atari’s Paperboy? Ah, bland suburban complacency, the muted rustle of newspapers hitting the lawn, and a halcyon age of wide-eyed innocence when videogames were about things like, well, chucking newspapers. Now, Postal – its obvious titular connotations notwithstanding – isn’t quite the same sort of thing. This is the other, grislier sort [...]

The short version: Messiah is a game by Shiny Entertainment. That should tell you everything you need to know already. It’s actually quite possible to devise a drinking game that focuses entirely on sitting at the computer, playing through the game, and hunting for as many Shiny characteristics as possible. Take a sip every time [...]

In the not-too-distant future, the availability of resources becomes critical and mankind succumbs to the inevitability of war. Nuclear weapons are used and civilization disappears in the subsequent storm of atomic fire. A few fortunate people have been locked away in massive underground Vaults, allowing them to survive. You play one of these Vault-dwellers. The [...]

There are two sorts of contract killer. There’s the shady, scarred sort of guy with an eye patch and Eastern European accent who’s only ever glimpsed through a pall of cigarette smoke, hangs out in underworld bars with lighting problems, and has a nickname prefixed with Little or Lucky or The. He’d be prosecuted and [...]