UPDATE: We’ve added the cover and contents page to the end of the post. Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-BATMAN!

Would you look at that super-sexy bit of magazine cover? Isn’t it all lovely and special and eye-catching and… hang on, we can’t actually show you our May issue’s cover. Reason being: it’s top-secret. For now, at least. According to this soul-binding legal agreement we’ve signed, we’re only actually allowed to show you this Friday, the 26th of April. There’s a clause in there that explicitly states that should we not keep this secret as mega-secret as secretly possible, packs of angry wolves will descend on our office to ravage our coffee supply and use up all the toilet paper. And we simply cannot have that.

So! Return here this Friday for a peek at what you’ll be able spot on store shelves this Thursday the 25th, and possibly even today if you’re a subscriber. It makes no sense, sure: but them’s the rules!

While we also can’t show you our contents page, because of stuff and things, we can actually use words to detail some of what you’ll discover in this month’s issue. Breach the break for maximum discovery.

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April. The month of blatant lies on foolish days, and as an added bonus, delicious chocolate bunnies. It’s also the month of glow-in-the-dark covers.

Wait… what?

Click through for THE TRUTH.

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Happy March everyone! It’ll not be long before them there leaves start browning, days begin shortening and we’re suddenly all huddled together in one giant human ball, whining about how cold it is. Or, in words shamelessly jacked from Game of Thrones: winter is coming. As is our March issue. You may already even have it, because you’re a dirty time-travelling cheat. Or you’re just incredibly lucky.

Either way, if you’d like to see what’s in store for you with NAG magazine this month, step into our web-office.

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Can you feel that? It’s all around you. That’s the feeling of 2013 in full swing. A whole new year, filled with whole new possibilities and unfiltered, bright-eyed optimism. Or perhaps that feeling is just what life feels like when gaming slows to a crawl and there’s very little by way of new games to play. Either way, we have a magazine for you. It’s marked February 2013, which means NAG‘s year is now officially all systems go.

If you fancy a peek at what the February issue of the magazine has to offer this month, dig a little deeper.

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The problem with holidays is that, even though in life’s all-encompassing holiday brochure we’re shown photos of what promises to be a relaxing time filled with people doing as much nothing as possible, they really do tend to get quite busy. Thus, there’s actually no time to spend writing hundreds of words detailing the wonders and excitement of the first issue of NAG magazine of our year 2013, because we have to get back to scrubbing sea sand out of our nethers, attempting real-life rocket jumps, filling ourselves with booze and all those other oddly time-consuming activities that occupy time spent not at work. Thankfully, where time fails us, there’s always the ever-trusty contents page of the magazine that’ll give you a quick idea of what’s what in the January 2013 edition of your favourite mag. Click through for a look at the cover as well!

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Merry festive season everyone! We know we’re a tad early (or perhaps we’re right on time, or even six months late, because you might be reading this in the future), but we’ve gotten ourselves overly excited now that it’s that time of year again where Santa (or whichever present-bringing person it is that gives you free-but-not-actually-free stuff around this time of year as a reward for surviving another 12 months) brings us all of the games, ever, gift-wrapped and stacked precariously under a tree covered in flashy bits and bobs. Perhaps you don’t get involved in all this Christmas madness at all, but still use this time for a good bit of relaxation and the opportunity to sink countless hours into all those games you didn’t have time to play earlier in the year.

Either way, December is glorious, and there’s always (hopefully) plenty of reason to look forward to all the end-of-year goodness we’ve seemingly raced towards (at this very moment, there is somebody out there shaking their head, remarking on how they can’t believe its December already). And with the Wii U, Nintendo would like to give you yet another reason to love this year’s end.

Head past the break for a peek at what you can expect from our December issue.

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Universal truth: throughout history (ALL OF IT), everything that’s ever lived, and that ever will live will always have at least a faint love of LEGO and all its trappings, even when it’s in video game form. By that logic, that makes this the most important historical cover that we’ve ever produced, because that’s just how science works. Just go with it.

By now you’ve probably guessed that this month’s issue is covered in spilt LEGO pieces that you thought you’d lost until your mom stepped on it and promptly tried to murder you for trying to murder her feet with errant brightly coloured plastic blocks that it’s actually totally her fault for not seeing and jeez mom get off my case and I’m a grown man now and yes I still love LEGO and ooh is that Minecraft and…

I seem to have lost my train-smash of thought. Hit the jump for clarity!

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October is a special month for us, and for gamers all across South Africa really. That’s because October is rAge month, which makes the October issue of NAG our rAge issue, which makes this issue of NAG more memorable than witnessing the rebirth of the dinosaurs, or making someone’s head explode with nothing but the power of your mind, or seeing a squirrel do a real-life rocket jump. Perhaps it’s nowhere near as memorable as any of those things, but it is nevertheless memorable in its own memorable way. We promise.

Head past the break for a peek at our October (i.e. rAge 2012!) issue and its delectable contents.

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So where’s that XCOM FPS gone then? We’re not sure, and frankly, we don’t actually give a damn at this very moment. What’s happening right now that we do actually give very many damns about is the real XCOM remake, and it’s all up in our magazine like probes in… orifices. We’ve got our hands covered in everything Enemy Unknown, and we’d like to drop the details of our experience into your brain.

Click through for a look at the most beautiful magazine cover you’ll see all day, and the contents PDF for the September 2012 issue of your favourite magazine.

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YOU! You look 100% interested in what it is we have on display here, because you’re a human of refined taste. You can smell Potential OMG from half a world away. And your thereby discerning nostrils have brought you to the right place, as there is most certainly OMG within this here post. Four scrumptious varieties of it.

If we’ve successfully pocketed your intrigue, then take the leap of faith into the candy-filled chasm below. In other words, click that there “read more” button with all of your clicking hand’s might.

COMPLETELY UNRELATED

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