Right, it is now categorically safe to say that gaming special editions have jumped the shark. Until a game comes out that offers a special edition that come bundled with your own planet, there won’t be a special edition as certifiably bat-shit crazy as this one-of-a-kind Saints Row IV: Super Dangerous Wad Wad Edition. It’ll cost you just less than R10 million rand; $1 million to be exact.
The Saints Row games have developed this preoccupation with OTT flamboyance so it’s fitting that this special edition has been assigned to the version of the game in which the Third Street Saints become super heroes or presidents of the universe or something – I’m battling to keep up with the absurdity to be honest.
After the jump you’ll find a nice little bullet-pointed list of what’s included in the Super Dangerous Wad Wad Edition. Highlights include a trip into space with Virgin Galactic, a Lamborghini Gallardo for a year, a day of actual spy training and my personal favourite, plastic surgery of your choice. I’m not making this up.
A copy of Saints Row IV: Commander in Chief Edition (oh good, the game is included. Whew!)
A trip into space with Virgin Galactic
A Hostage Rescue experience (because I’ve always wanted to know what that’s like)
A full-size replica of the Dub-Step Gun
A day of Spy Training
Plastic Surgery of your choice (WTAF?)
Capsule Wardrobe (whatever that is)
A personal shopper (presumably to help you with said Capsule Wardrobe?)
A week for two in the Jefferson Hotel in Washington DC
7 nights at the top suite in the Burj-Al-Arab in Dubai (that hotel that looks like a sail)
First class flights to Washington and Dubai
A year membership to the Super Car club
Which gets you a Lamborghini Gallardo for a year
And to counteract the awesome of the Lamborghini Gallardo, you get a new Toyota Prius with 1 year of insurance (umm, yay?)
This special edition is only available via the UK’s GAME stores. Anyone who is genuinely interested in buying this (and I kind of hope that there is somebody nuts enough to do so) is requested to send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org. This is a joke, right? I’m sure this is a joke.