“There is no power greater than X,” Xbox boss Phil Spencer explains to an audience of disciples bathed in the sorcerous green lights of the Galen Centre in Los Angeles, their rapturous gazes turned upwards, enthralled, at an enormous 4K screen. “It’s the most powerful console ever made.”

Acolytes in the front rows writhe with devotion and ecstasy, occult adorations falling from their lips. The spell is cast. Scorpions tumble from the ceiling. Pandemonium reigns.

THE XBOX ONE X… XBONEX… XBOX

It’s supposed to be out worldwide on 7 November, but that almost definitely doesn’t include us. Over on the local Xbox website, the New! Improved! Now with more impressive numbers! console has an ambiguous “coming soon” launch date with a R7499 pricetag, so start saving now. Or sell your organs.

Original Xbox games are getting backwards compatibility support on Xbox One too

And they’re probably not as amazing as you remember them.

Cars, cars, cars

Forza 7. It’s more or less exactly what you’d expect, now with the new 2018 Porsche 911 GT2 RS.

The next Assassin’s Creed is called Origins and it’s set in ancient Egypt

Gasp. The game features new protagonist Bayek, a magi who must confront the “corrupting” forces in his home by, like, starting his very own assassin’s club. You also get a pet hawk that can spy for you, so I’m pre-ordering.

Metro: Exodus is a thing, apparently

Talking to Polygon, executive producer John Bloch reveals that the game continues from one of Metro: Last Light‘s endings, and that protagonist Artyom and some other survivors will eventually leave Moscow and travel around post-apocalyptic Russia on a steam train called the Aurora. Whether or not they’ll resort to cannibalism and a coup is a matter of speculation for now, though.

The Last Night is a “post-cyberpunk” platformer with a neon-retro aesthetic

Yes, please.

And The Artful Escape looks uniquely bizarre

According to the video description on YouTube, it’s about “great expectations, famous folk singers, lingering shadows, space Gods, hallucinogens, individuality, reptile shops, and wild imaginations”, and it’s the trippiest thing you’ll see today.

Cuphead gets a release date (!), Ori and the Will of the Wisps is real, and Terry Crews is hyped about Crackdown 3

BioWare’s Anthem is Destiny with exosuits and jetpacks

… And not a card-based MOBA for mobile. We don’t know much else about it yet, but this debut gameplay demo is absolutely phenomenal.

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