Every doctor dreams of a world without responsibility, ethics, or legal consequences. It’s an important experiment, okay, and if it works – and I’m not promising it’s going to work, but it could work, maybe – this could probably even cure tonsilitis. Besides, who even needs a tongue? It’s like this totally pointless flap of tissue and it gets in the way of food. Nurse, please pass the hammer. We’re making history over here.

Coming out next week on Nintendo Switch, this New, Improved, Now With 100% More Liability Insurance! version of Bossa Studio’s medical malpractice-’em-up features motion controls and local co-op, so you can waive those patient procedure indemnities (SEE WHAT I DID THERE) with an accomplice. I mean a… second opinion. Yes. That.

Scrub up and prep for an emergency heart transplant procedure that was supposed to be a routine checkup with this very educational trailer.

Surgeon Simulator CPR is out on 13 September.