No, seriously. Tamagotchis are back. Again. Nineties kids will remember that they were all the craze back then – and now Bandai is here to empty our wallets and fill our hearts with nostalgia.
If you’re not too sure what a Tamagotchi is (which, no offence, is quite distressing), it’s merely a cute device that contains a digital pet. It’s the obvious, cheap, fun and affordable solution for parents and kids who can’t afford a “real” pet. Naturally, it comes with all the tasks and chores that come with owning an actual pet, though. Exciting, isn’t it?
The new Tamagotchi model, called Tamagotchi On, is here to appeal to a younger generation, while also appealing to the nostalgia of the now older generation of human beings that used to use them. It comes with Bluetooth and an infrared sensor to connect to your phone and other Tamagotchi On devices.
Tamagotchi On is built with a wide variety of innovative new features. Proud Tamagotchi owners can now have their virtual pet marry and breed with other people’s pets, with the consent of both parties of course, because raising a digital pet from childhood to adulthood wasn’t enough responsibility for one person to take. You’ll now have the chance to walk your fully grown pet (or child, because we honestly can’t tell the difference anymore) down the digital aisle and marry them off to someone else’s. After that, they will participate in off-screen digital coitus and produce their new generation of offspring. They grow up so fast!
Not only that, but you can also send your pet on playdates, have them visit friends, hotels, go to restaurants or even travel, to name a few of the new fancy features made available. These are all possible thanks to the Tamagotchi On App, which will also be available at the same time as the device. Honestly, when did digital pets become such a hassle to take care of? Also, when did digital pets start having such a lavish lifestyle? Needless to say, I’m jealous.
Tamagotchi On will be released in July this year. Contrary to its older models, which sold for as little as $15, this one will be going for $60. That’s a significant step up in pricing for all that self-inflicted responsibility. I can’t take care of myself, let alone a virtual pet!
If you’ve always wanted a pet, to feel the weight of virtual parenting responsibilities, or to simply relive the trauma/nostalgia of coming home to find that your favourite virtual companion has passed on, then this new product is definitely for you.
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